Movies for Adults
by Allen Wagner

Okay, so Rusty gets in touch with me and says we're going to be doing a list of movies for adults, but not "adult movies." Skipping all jokes about porn, for a good day I tried to figure out what qualified as movies for adults. Or better yet, "brain-required" movies, which I think he was asking for. I could try to justify each movie, but it'd be better to talk about the criteria I eventually tried to develop for movies that kids don't or won't get fully.

It's not based on violence. Saving Private Ryan is plenty violent, but is quite an easy concept to understand by people of all ages. It's not sexual content, because Philadelphia had a lot to do with "sketchy" sex subjects, but again is quite easily understood by any kid who watches it. It's not adult dialog. Pulp Fiction and many other movies go nuts with the "vulgar" language, but that doesn't mean I didn't understand it when I saw it as a young teen. So it seems I'm getting at movies where you kind of have to have lived a while and developed your brain to really understand them. And it's not inside jokes that equal intelligence. It's smart writing. And confusing doesn't equal intelligent.

So after I kept debunking myself, I just thought of the Polyphonic Spree. A lot of people like them, but not many people understand what it is they like. The Polyphonic Spree is doing something pretty intelligent within the music, and if you understand what that is, then you understand why it is that you like it, and I think that's the final criteria for an adult movies list. It's not only being able to like the movie, but to understand why you like it. And certain movies have things that for the most part younger people aren't going to be able to see or understand, or better yet appreciate.

So after I came up with that idea, it came to finding movies where you don't just enjoy but appreciate and can applaud the makers of the film for making such a good movie. I also think about how realistic the movie is within itself. If the movie deals with fantasy, and it stays within bounds of its own fantasy, then it's fine.

I have no intention of ever trying to pick my favorites, or coming up with an ordered list, so I made a list, shuffled it up, and will write about them in that order. I'm also going to write about the movies themselves, not justify why they are adult-ish. So here are thirty or so movies you should check out.

The Pianist – Wow, so the shuffler got this up first, eh? This one is pretty self-explanatory if you've seen it, so I won't comment on it other than saying "brilliant story, and brilliant movie making."

Love and Basketball – This will be the first of many movies to follow a trend. A fiction movie that is best at being realistic, or better yet that shows the theme that things can still be good after being messed up.

Reservoir Dogs – A lot of people have either a) an undying love or b) hate for Quentin Tarantino. I have neither. I like some of his movies that are good, but dislike the ones that aren't good. Reservoir Dogs is a very good movie, very original, and—if anything—home to one of the best scenes in movies when Mr. Blond goes out to the car and the music stops because he's away from his radio and then it comes back when he goes back inside. It shows the realistic idea of how these moments with a psycho would go down.

The Emperor's Club – "A day I start off rowing is better than ones I don't." The movie is great because it's real. Not everyone is perfect, not everyone has a happy ending, but if you are the best you can be, then that's all there is to it. While Dead Poet's Society is a coming of age story, this is the story of someone who's teaching the lessons.

Tin Cup – A lot of people may argue this being on the list, but for starters it's the best golf movie there is. Also, it's one of the best sports movies there is, not only for the realism, but the true originality of it. Most people would cave into make the traditional underdog movie, but this one showed you what it's really like to be an underdog in the professional golf world.

Play It to the Bone -The real underside of the sport.

Bugsy – I have an uncle who once told me, "I don't like movies where I have to root for a bad guy," but I say, "I don't like movies where I have to root for stupid people." This is one where I get to root for a smart guy.

Good Will Hunting – There's no shortage of great acting, and it's only paralleled by the story. "It's the little things."

Life or Something Like It – All preconceptions about Angelina Jolie aside, it's all summed up like this: What would you do if you knew exactly when you were going to die?

Seven Years in Tibet / De-Lovely / The Aviator / Amadeus / Glory / Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World – I'm going to throw these together as extraordinary real stories being portrayed extraordinarily well.

28 Days Later – It's not a scary movie because you run from something scary. It's scary because of the realism that this is what would really happen if such a thing ever occurred.

Ronin / The Bourne Identity / The Bourne Supremacy – They aren't exactly the same movie, but they are alike enough that I only have to comment once. All are realistic versions of agents and espionage. No crazy gadgets, no supervillains, just real serious bad guys, bad for specific reasons, not because they are crazy on world domination. And they'll kill you instead of putting you in some situation you can get out of.

American Beauty – Everyone probably has seen it, so I probably don't need to comment on it.

The Silence of the Lambs – There was nothing like this when it showed up, and still nothing has been able to get close to it.

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon / Hero / House of Flying Daggers – These are all movies people think they are supposed to like or think they are cool for the action or special effects, and the whole time they forget to watch the great stories, in addition to the culture and fights.

Boiler Room – I think I watched this movie at a perfect time because I had just interviewed for a job with something where it was pretty easy to figure out that it was a pyramid scheme. I also think this movie has a lot of guys showing decent acting skills in a movie that pisses off their normal fans because it's not like their other stuff.

Big Fish – It's good. I'm not sure what comments I could give on it other than if you have a decent enough imagination to understand the concepts, it's a really good movie about storytelling in general.

Wimbledon – This came close to not making the list because people push it off as a "love" story, but I don't think it is. I think it's a great movie about the realistic end of tennis, especially the absolutely awesome radio head when he's in the middle of matches. Plus there's no absolute evil or good, just nice people and assholes like real life.

Being John Malkovich – Malkovich Malkovich Malkovich? Malkovich Malkovich Malkovich.

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind – If I had to pick a top five for this list, this one is in there, maybe even close to being number one. It really is rare for a movie to come along that's not entirely revolutionary so much as it captures a thought that we all have but never really communicate. A lot of love movies try to capitalize on the "wanting what you got instead of getting what you want" kind of thing, but this isn't even in the same ballpark as those others. Just grade A good.

For Love of the Game – This is the best movie about conventional baseball there is. It is the only movie of the many that captures what baseball is really like. It captures the low-cal attitudes, along with the head games, along with the craziness of a ball player's life, and just how much something you grew up with can become part of your life.

High Fidelity – This is where I got my pension for making numbered lists of things. Young people might like Jack Black, but chances are they don't understand anything else in it or why it's funny or whatever else it is.

Memento / The Usual Suspects – The movies you watch multiple times and each time catch something new and think, "Damn that's cool."

Training Day – No one who went into this movie knew what was going to happen, and none of them expected the things that happened to happen. I guarantee that. For that reason alone, it qualified for this list.

Punch-Drunk Love – An easy way to find out what kind of a person someone is: ask their opinion on this movie. If they didn't like it because a) Adam Sandler wasn't funny or b) it didn't make sense or c) it didn't resemble love, then they probably don't like any other movies in my list. Its pretty simple. If you think you have everything figured out and down to a pattern, what is something that will make you change everything just to have it?

Thursday – I left this for last because I just love this movie and pretty much no one I know has seen it. I really can't describe it other than: good. This is probably also a top five on my list, maybe not number one, but it definitely scores an A for "Yeah, I can believe this is how it would happen." Go see this movie.